Thursday, December 17, 2009

Christmas Gifts--Men vs. Women

And there it was--an article I linked to titled: "The Gift That Needs Forgiving," or "Gifts You're Better Off Not Giving." The title made me smile and I clicked the link to read more.

And this article was so true! the differences between men and women when it comes to Christmas gift shopping and giving.

There are a couple excerpts from the article I want to share with you:

Of course, gifts between couples can backfire in either direction. But—please don't shoot the messenger—men seem to be more clueless than women.

Women tend to care more about gifts. They shop more, and think more about them. They attach more emotion to them. And they can be more demanding and less direct. (If I ask my husband what he wants for the holidays, he will say "nothing" and mean it. If he asks me, I will say "nothing," as well. And God help him if he believes me.)

Making matters even worse: When it comes to bad gifts, women have the memory of elephants. Take Donna Clark Goodrich. In 1962, she asked her husband for a recording of Handel's "Messiah." Instead, he got her a parody LP of the Kennedy family by impressionist Vaughn Meader. "I've never let my husband live that Christmas down," says Ms. Goodrich, 71, a writer in Mesa, Ariz.

If it weren't for the gifts and all the shopping and all of the stress--I think Christmas would be a great holiday!

The eating is good, the parties are grand, and the general jovial nature of people in holiday spirit is fantastic. But it is the gifts. We even make fun of the gifts at office parties by having white elephant gift exchanges or Chinese gift exchanges.

We need to listen to each other--but the article continues later:

Then why so many bad gifts within couples?

It's simple, really. Sometimes men aren't listening to their wives. But just as often, women aren't clear about their desires. They want men to pick up on their subtle clues, rather than telling them outright what they'd like. As one woman I know explains, "It means we are special to them if they detect what we want without us telling them."

But here is the bottom line:

And there's the rub. When men receive gifts they hate, they typically shrug them off. Women, faced with the same dilemma, feel hurt.

Really? Now I think I understand.

I admit, there have been a few gifts that I have not appreciated that I continue to hold on to the memory of--but for the most part I couldn't even tell you what I received last Christmas let alone from who! Except for Makayla from everyone--but she was probably one of the greatest Christmas gifts I ever received, well at least since my first bicycle when I was a kid. I still remember that Christmas morning . . .

OK--the solution to the gifting problem!

Women need to lighten up and men need to listen up!

Merry Christmas

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