Tuesday, January 7, 2014

How Cold is it?

It was so cold, I think I saw a polar bear moving in down the street.

I noticed something, the more the news media and the weather professionals talked about the record setting cold, the colder I became. It was weird. I was getting cold just hearing people talk about the cold.

And it seemed colder outside, too.

I thought I could see my breath in the office. I even had to put my sports coat on because I started to get cold and it was still 40 something degrees outside. And then the temperature started to drop. By 9 PM last evening, it was 16 degrees and falling.

This morning at 4:48 the temperature reached a frigid 2.7 degrees and probably would continue to fall as dawn was still two hours away.

Just more excitement, compliment of Mother Nature.

So, I thought a couple of cold jokes would be nice:

Q: Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman than a regular one? 
A: You have to hollow out the head. 

It was so cold that:

 -Some people walked around for days with spoons or forks stuck to their tongues! 

 -Hitchhikers were holding up pictures of thumbs! 

 -Roosters were rushing into Kentucky Fried Chicken and begging to use the pressure cooker! 

 -When I dialed 911, a recorded message said to phone back in the spring! 

 -The optician was giving away free ice scrapers with every new pair of eyeglasses! 

 -Kids were using a new excuse to stay up late: "But Mom, my pyjamas haven't thawed out yet!" 
-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

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