Christmas Isn't Joy for Everyone

I am reminded this morning as I am celebrating the birth of the Savior of the World: the Son of God who became man, so that men could become son's of God; that many people are in pain and cannot fully accept or appreciate the gifts or even the simple greeting: Merry Christmas!

My heart grieves for them because they are grieving. They are grieving the loss of loved ones, or health, or jobs, or something equally as tragic and important. They look at those of us who are celebrating and wonder why? Why did someone have to be taken from them or why did they get cancer or some other terrible disease. 

It is hard, no it may be impossible to accept the simple Merry Christmas greeting of others without being hurt and cynical and saying under their breath, "If you only knew," or "What's so Merry about it?"

I know people who are hurting today. And it hurts more today because they want to be happy, but they cannot. They withdraw.

What can I say to them? Nothing. 

I am reminded of verses from Job 2:12-13 where some friends came upon Job who was suffering a tragedy.

2:12 But when they gazed intently from a distance but did not recognize him, they began to weep loudly. Each of them tore his robes, and they threw dust into the air over their heads. 2:13 Then they sat down with him on the ground for seven days and seven nights, yet no one spoke a word to him, for they saw that his pain was very great. (NET Bible)

No one said a thing. Sometimes the right thing to say is nothing at all. But the most important thing was being together, they were there, even in the silence.

That is what we need to do to help our friends and family who are suffering during this season--be with them and help them to know, not through words but through actions, that they are loved and supported. 

I pray that those who mourn will be comforted, those who suffer illnesses will find relief, and those who are facing the worst that life can dish out will find the strength to wake up tomorrow and say to themselves: today is the first day of the rest of my life and I am not going to waste it!

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

It's Christmas Eve Again or Finally

The words and tune of a 1971 song have been rattling around in my head for the past day or so. It is a John Lennon song written during the height of the Vietnam anti-war, peace movement. The song is titled, And So This is Christmas. It has been covered by many artists including Celine Dion, although I like the original Lennon version, too.






And So This Is Christmas

So this is christmas and what have you done

another year over a new one just begun

and so this is christmas I hope you have fun

the near and the dear one the old and the young

A very merry christmas and a happy new year

let's hope it's a good one without any fear 

And so this is christmas for weak and for strong 

the rich and the poor ones the world is so wrong 

and so happy christmas for black and for white 

for the yellow and the red ones let's stop all the fight 

A very merry christmas and a happy new year 

let's hope it's a good one without any fear 

And so this is christmas and what have we done 

another year over and a new one just begun 

and so happy christmas I hope you have fun 

the near and the dear one the old and the young 

A very merry christmas and a happy new year 

let's hope it's a good one without any fear 

war is over if you want it war is over now

I think what has grabbed my attention is how the words are ringing so true this year. We are in a torn world where wars are rampant internationally and there is tension here in America between the police and citizens. If I let myself--I might think everything is bad.

But--it is Christmas. And my prayer is for peace, protection, love, healing and helping. We can give these gifts to each other.

God bless you and protect you.

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

The Eve of Christmas Eve

I remember that when I was young--very young, like 8-ish, that the longest day of the year seemed to be the day before Christmas Eve. Yes, Christmas Eve could be long too, but at least there were activities planned, like church, which provided mile markers along the pathway of the day.

The day before Christmas Eve, however, has no such mile markers to guide the day along and see it to a successful conclusion and transform the season from anticipation to almost here. I note that the local schools are mostly open today--and that is good for the kids, it will help them not to dwell on the "you can almost reach out and touch it" aspect of Christmas being upon us. 

I do not get into the Christmas spirit until very late in the season. Usually, my favorite day to shop is Christmas Eve because there is a feeling of magic and a sense of "this is it" watching the other shoppers scurry around. I remember working in the clothing store in Ithaca, NY, while I was in high school on Christmas Eves--the store had been open for almost two weeks straight until 9 PM, (except for Sundays when it was closed and Saturdays when closing was still 5PM) that was four hours longer than the normal closing time. I always noticed a change in the shoppers and the staff about noon--as the impending holiday grew closer.

But, the day before Christmas Eve has no sense of finality associated with it. There is still Christmas Eve out there if something needs to get done. Today, for instance, I have to slug to work--being sick and had this been a normal week I would have taken another sick day because I am feeling only about 60 percent--but with Christmas Eve tomorrow and I will be on leave and holiday for almost two weeks, I have a lot of loose ends to tie up. Somewhere in there the meat for Christmas dinner is waiting at the store--I have to purchase it and get in ready for the upcoming feast. 

And then Chris and I need to finalize the breakfasts, dinners, and create the agenda for Christmas Eve and prepare to plow into Christmas which has become a full two-day family celebration which begins with breakfast on Christmas Eve and does not end until after the last present is opened and dinner is complete sometime about 5PM on Christmas Day. 

So for me, Christmas Eve Eve has become Christmas Eve--because everything begins happening tomorrow as the season of preparation transforms into the season of joy and understanding that the most important gift was the one that we first received. You can read about it in Galatians 4:4-5. 

Say Merry Christmas to someone you meet--it will make them smile!

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

Monday Musings - December 22, 2014

1. The pace of life has continued to increase as the holiday season deepens. The is going to be a big sigh about 3PM on Thursday as all of the anticipation turns into wishes fulfilled.

2. Rain is the forecast for the next three days. At least it is not snow. The forecast for Christmas Day is for 50's and a heat wave!

3. 2014 is drawing to a quick close. It's funny, I just got comfortable writing 2014 and soon I will have to start writing 2015.

4. Being sick sucks! Seriously. Especially when it is a couple of days before Christmas and there is so much to do. So I'm home today feeling so worn out that I am not doing anything.

5. The news from this past weekend was especially bad. The assassination of the police officers in New York City was especially heinous. If I only listened to the news media, I might think nothing good ever happens, but I know there are millions of points of light out in the world doing good for other people.

6. I wrote about the governmental approved torture in my blog When the Good Guys Aren't. There is a good OpEd piece in the New York Times today titled Prosecute Torturers and Their Bosses that cogently expresses a good view on the matter. 


7. OK, I am tired of looking out my window at the leafless trees and gray colors. Bring on the green!

8. The NFL season is finally winding down. Baseball is two months away as pitchers and catchers are scheduled to report.

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

And the Evening was Quiet

A funny thing happened yesterday evening--Chris and I were at home. . . 

And that was the funny thing! For better than the past two weeks we have been on a constant tear with somewhere to go and something to see or buy. 

Not so last night. A quiet, sappy movie, The Holiday, was on the Blu-ray player (betcha haven't thought about Blu-ray in a while). The house was quiet. Just the cats and dog for a nice evening. It was really different. We relaxed and let the Christmas spirit seep into our souls. Well, and a bottle of wine, too!

Louis in the Nativity

The fire in the hearth was a fascinating attraction for Riordin--he loves the heat from the fire. Louis, on the other hand, picked a quiet spot in the Nativity for a nap. One swipe of his tail and the whole nativity could be lost! Fortunately, he is pretty careful.

Riordin by the Fire

And Makayla? She was sprawled out on the floor--not really picture worthy. 

And that was how the first quiet evening of Christmas played out. 

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

Enjoying the Lights in Dundalk

New holiday experiences can be fun and add some variety to the seasonal preparations. Last evening Chris and I along with a few friends went to Captain Larry's, a Baltimore City neighborhood bar, and boarded a school bus to tour the Christmas lights in Dundalk, Maryland.

There are a lot of local jokes about Dundalk--but last evening the joke was on the jokesters as the residents showed off their artistic skills in their holiday decorations. The bus stopped in front of the best yards and the revelers disembarked to enjoy the lights and chat with the owners, it they were lucky enough to be home.

It was fun riding around on a too full bus with other holiday revelers enjoying the lights while also supporting a local charity, BARCS, a no-kill animal shelter.

We learned about the Dundalk Trinity: Mickey Mouse, Snoopy, and Baby Jesus all incorporated into one lawn display. Seriously! It was identified more than once by the eagled-eyed viewers on the bus. 

We also learned about yard lights which are matched to music. Dial up an FM radio transmitter and watch the lights dance to the music. It was pretty to watch. I took a short video of the lights at one stop, but couldn't hear the music. I actually thought the video was longer when I was taking it.

It was a full evening. There was also a stop at a neighborhood bar, Howard's Pub and Deli, in Dundalk for food and fuel that broke up the bus ride. Then it was back to scouring the neighborhoods from the big yellow school bus for the best yards. 

Fun and different. A new holiday tradition? Maybe!

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

One Week to Go

Columbia Mall, MD
December 18, 2014

What did I do last evening? Scoured the local mall for the final gifts of Christmas.

Unsuccessfully, I must add because at least one gift remains at large.

The parking lots were overflowing, the stores were jammed and the holiday spirit was noticeably absent from most of the people I came across during my walk around the Columbia Mall. It was a bit sad and I have to admit that I too, had a frown and not a smile on my face.

Shopping during the holiday season is no fun! Traffic and people and overloaded stores.

It is necessary, however.

Here's hoping your shopping experience is rewarding.

--Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

Steak on the Bar-bee; Stain on the ceiling

Steak on the Bar-bee

I celebrated unseasonably mild temperatures last evening by cooking a steak on the grill for dinner. It was a mid-December treat. Even though my grill is under cover and I can grill year round, December is tough because of the obstacles caused by decorations arrayed between the kitchen and the grill.

The grilled steak was a treat along with some steamed vegetables and a carb free dinner in preparation for more weekend carb loading. Last weekend was a two pound weekend! Ugh.

I don't need that again, it takes all week to recover from three successive days of overeating.

But racquetball helps to get the weight back within targets.

One thing, in addition to the shopping and gifting, that is literally hanging over my head is the stain on the ceiling from the over flowing toilet tank. It is there, right in the family room waiting for paint. 

I think it is finally dry enough to prime with Kilz and then paint for effect. 

I am still amazed at the mess one slowly overflowing toilet tank can cause. I just need everything to be really dry before I repair the damage and put the light fixture back into place. Maybe I can get to the damage once the purchasing and present wrapping is completed--whenever that happens.

It is a busy time of year.

One week to go until the big day. Shopping is nearly, mostly complete!

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

The Joy of the Season - Elementary School Holiday Concert

Ethan on the Cello

The pace of life is increasing to match the reduced time until Christmas and it seems that more and more activities get crammed into every evening. Last evening it was the annual Holiday concert at Waugh Chapel Elementary School in Odenton, Maryland, where Ethan and his cello were front and center.

The concert was short--because the school has wisely separated the ban and orchestral concerts due to lack of space and fire marshall concerns for overloading the cafeteria/auditorium. OK, maybe it was a bit too short--the orchestral concert was over in 25 minutes and it takes longer than that to drive to the school in traffic and get prepared for an evening of music.

But, the concert was fun and it was great to see "E-dawg" play his cello, he is a second year cello student, and enjoy the attention he received. 

Being his second year with the cello, he was ready for and seemed to revel in the chaos that is an elementary school music presentation. I was excited to see that the cello's, there are three, were situated front and center in the orchestra. Not only could I see him, but during the one piece that contained a cello solo I could even hear him. 

Note: I did not shoot the video, the person who took it forgot that movies need to be taken in the horizontal and not vertical direction. 

I enjoyed the serious look on his face as he strove to create music in a less than perfect environments followed by the smile of achievement when it was over. 

It was a great evening and a great celebration. Good job to all of the young musicians!

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

When the Good Guys, Aren't

The revelations about the extent to which the United States government tolerated and possibly authorized extreme torture against enemy prisoners under its control as depicted in the Senate Select Committee on Intelligence (SSCI) report on the CIA's detention and interrogation program  have deeply affected me. 

I am appalled.

The report details a very dark time in our history where it seems that the moral character and fiber of all Americans is suspect.

As an American and a private citizen I am gonna lay it out right here: torturing prisoners is wrong and constitutes a breach of faith and potentially criminal acts, no matter what the politicians and appointed officials say.

Torturing prisoners is un-American!

I have always believed that we, the United States of America, were above the use of these tactics against our enemies. We used to be proud of the moral high ground that we as a nation walked. Even in the face of intolerable torture, such as depicted in the book and movie Unbroken, Americans have always possessed and portrayed the best traits of the human race by resisting the urge to torture and mistreat of prisoners.

Sadly, the SSCI report, which I laud the committee for releasing, describes how this is no longer true. We have stooped to the same level, or possibly below that of our adversaries. We, as a society and a nation, have taken a left turn with no blinker and traveled down the dark road into abyss of torture and human rights violations from which we must now extricate ourselves and work to repair our reputation around the world.

And now we are trying to justify this behavior!

Our moral character is suspect and our position as a world leader for human rights is tarnished, possibly beyond repair.

I have read much of the report and listened to the political leaders who try to say that the ends justifies the means--it does not!

In reading the SSCI report, I now firmly believe that those who participated in the torture and inhumane treatment of prisoners of from the War on Terror are no better than many of the War Criminals convicted at the end of World War 2 as a result of the Nuremberg and other post-war trials.

The Code of Conduct is clear about how American POWs are supposed to conduct themselves in captivity, do we have any reason to expect less from our enemies? The Constitution is clear, no matter how those involved in this black eye against America try to skirt it by not bringing people into or onto the territory of the united States. By following the letter of the law, the intent of the law has been violated.

Didn't anyone realize that these activities and actions were wrong and possibly illegal? No one stood up to say, we need to stop? And now the dark truth is exposed and it is far worse than we all realized at the time.

We need to beg forgiveness from the court of the world and vow that this type of behavior will never be tolerated again.

We the People must not tolerate this aberrant behavior anymore. It is time to ensure that our leaders and the instruments of our government do not engage in torture--anywhere in the world. It is just wrong!

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD