Monday Musings - March 10, 2014

1. March has arrived and now in its second week, maybe some signs of Spring will be found, soon.

2. During a birthday celebration last week, I overheard a my daughter tell Jackson, as he was leaning in close to blow out the candles on the birthday cake, not to kiss the candle because the relationship would never work out.

3. It is amazing was a few hours at the groomers will do for Makayla--she looks like a completely different dog. Actually, she looks more like a Norwegian Elkhound than a Keeshond.

4. Why does it seem that although I have access to more TV channels, I am finding less to watch? I am beginning to watch baseball games and hockey matches between teams I don't care about just to find something to watch. 

5. I'm looking forward to getting to Sarasota in a few weeks for Spring Training--at least it will be warm there.

6. In an effort to accelerate the arrival of Springtime, we went to the Maryland Home and Garden Show yesterday. It was great to walk among the flowers and displays imagining things that we cannot afford. But, we also found some perfect furnishings as we continue our home makeover.

7. It was really hard to get out of bed on this first Monday after Daylight Savings Time stole and hour from me.

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

Chasing Leprechauns

Ethan with his Leprechaun Trap

It is the time of year when thoughts turn to St Patrick Day, which is next week, and leprechauns.

My oldest grandson sets a leprechaun trap every year in an attempt to capture one of the elusive creatures and claim his pot of gold. It has become an annual event with Ethan developing a new and more creative trap every year and the leprechaun eluding capture, but leaving behind some treasure for his efforts.

It is a classic case of the chaser and the prey--except, much like the Roadrunner and Wile E. Coyote, the prey outwits the chaser every time. The coyote never could capture the roadrunner, either.

Ethan is employing a new tactic this year. He is has already set-up the trap, rather than waiting St Patrick's Eve, and is moving locations hoping to both lure and capture the leprechaun while he is reconnoitering the area. The bait? Lucky Charms, of course.

Good luck Ethan--I just hope you share some of the pot of gold with me when you finally capture that elusive leprechaun.

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

Springing Forward

It is coming, making its annual appearance to deprive nearly everyone in the United States of an hour of sleep. Tonight!

It is the Spring Forward into Daylight Savings time. Tonight, I lose an hour of sleep and it throws me off for about a week. 

But I do look forward to the arrival of Spring in the form of Daylight Savings Time. Only this year, Spring seems to be staying on holiday.

I have a few questions about the time savings: Where does the time go? Can I draw on it later? Does it gain interest? Why do I have to start driving to work in the dark again? Will the green grass return?

I look forward to tomorrow when I will look into the faces of the other church goers on the morning after the shorter night before. We will all have that bleary-eyed, self-satisfied look that says, yup, I remembered and I was able to drag my carcass out of bed an hour earlier to make it to church on time. 

At least this morning the temperature was 28 degrees, 24 degrees warmer than Tuesday morning. That is a positive sign. Maybe Spring will make an appearance soon after I save some daylight.

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

Great Military Commanders Responses in the Face of Adversity

I love the story of the American commander, General Anthony McAuliffe,  commander of the 101st Airborne Division surrounded by the Germans at Bastogne, Belgium, during the Battle of the bulge during late 1944 who responded to the German ultimatum for surrender with a single word: "Nuts." I have found another similar response which should be remembered, not for its shortness, but its eloquence.

I have been following with great interest the current situation in the Crimea which Russian forces have, without provocation, have decided to occupy. 

The LA Times reported an exchange between the commanding admiral of the Russian fleet and the Ukrainian naval base commander. The story, as reported goes as follows:

A Ukrainian navy sailor looks at the scuttled Russian ship
from the Black Sea shore. Photo: AP

Earlier in the week, the commander of the Russian Black Sea fleet, Adm. Alexander Vitko, visited Ukraine’s South Base, according to the deputy base commander, Capt. Viktor Shmiganovsky. 

“He asked me to invite all the officers and suggested that we collectively take up the Russian military allegiance oath and become part of the Black Sea fleet … promising good pay and a bright future,” Shmiganovsky said in an interview. “He insisted we do that to help protect Ukraine from extremist gangs.”

The officer said his boss, the base commander, retorted: “Comrade admiral, we didn't see any extremist gangs here until you came with your men.” He said the admiral left “in a rage.”

I really think this response says it all. Comrade Admiral--is a direct reference to the days of the oppressive Soviet Union. 

In response, the Russians sank a derelict vessel to trap the Ukrainian navy in its port. 

But the response was elegant and complete.

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

Hump Day Phenomena Affects Birthdays

Wednesday has become Hump Day. Actually it had been hump day for a long time, but the recent advertisements by a camel in an auto insurance commercial have cemented Wednesday as Hump Day and especially if your name happens to be Mike.

Coincidentally, Jackson's actual birthday fell on Hump Day this year. He was rewarded for this chance happening by having a creative birthday cake designed and baked by his mother. 

I found this cake to be very creative in its simplicity and beauty. Direct and to the point. It also tasted great--a four layer chocolate cake with vanilla frosting and fondant. Mmm.

The birthday boy (and his brother) also wore Hump Day T-shirts to commemorate the day.  Sadly, I didn't get a good picture of them in the shirts to remember the day. I need one of these shirts!

It was all in good fun and I do appreciate how the image of the camel has been transformed from a cigarette advertisement into a more family oriented symbol ringing in the middle day of the week.

Happy Birthday (yesterday) Jackson and to everyone who has a birthday on Wednesday this year, may your year always be on the upswing and not the downslide side of the hump.

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

De-Extintion Conundrum

NORTH WIND PICTURE ARCHIVES/VIA ASSOCIATED PRESS -
A woodcut from the 1870s shows passenger pigeons
being shot in Louisiana.

I read two compelling articles the other day about recreating Woolly Mammoths and other extinct species. One article was titled De-Extintion: Bringing Extinct Species back to Life and was published by the National Geographic. The other was published by the Washington Post and was titled Scientists look to revive the long extinct passenger pigeon. 

Can man really play god? Can we make right what went wrong? What about less desirable species, like insects or poisonous snakes?  Even dinosaurs?

These are good questions. 

I have long been fascinated by the plight of the passenger pigeon. Descriptions of the flocks numbering billions of individual birds and darkening the skies overhead are but memories as the last passenger pigeon died in 1914. And now, scientists believe that they can make right what man destroyed. 

Should they?

Is it right to recreate extinct species and place them again on the planet which has changed since they departed? It is a question of Jurassic Park implications. What if their reintroduction becomes a significant problem? What if they must be returned to extinction to for financial or other reasons? 

It is an issue that deserves a lot of thought before investing the millions of dollars to revive a species--even though I would love to see passenger pigeons darken the skies once again or maybe e ben see a woolly mammoth in a zoo somewhere. .

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

Who Loves the Snow?

Makayla in the Snow

One of my readers has accused me of writing too much about the snow. I stand convicted! I would prefer to write about warm sandy beaches--but there aren't any near me. The snow is ubiquitous and unending, it seems. Untile the snow had finally and completely departed there can be ". . . no joy in Mudville."

Yesterday I determined that one member of my family actually loves the snow. Makayla!

Although not technically a snow dog, like a huskie, she does have a double coat and she seems to love being out in the snow. The only time she asked to go out and just play and not perform some bodily function is during snow events. 

As the Storm Begins

Fortunately, the storm under performed yesterday. We were expecting up to 9 inches of fresh, while snow and received only about 5.

Yay. Less to shovel.

The bigger problem this morning are the record setting frigid temperatures. The record for the area is 5 degrees and at my house this morning the thermometer reads 5.4 degrees with still an hour to go before dawn.

That is too cold for Makayla. Too cold for me. Although, I am headed out in a few minutes to risk life and limb on the racquetball court. 

Hopefully, this will be my last blog about snow for the season, except to write that it has finally and completely departed and been replaced by green grass and flowers.  Time will tell.

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

Monday Musings - March 3, 2014

View in the Morning at the Beginning of the Storm

1. To misquote a line from a movie: Snow, why did it have to be snow? We are looking for up to 9 inches followed by bone chilling cold.

2. Soviet Reunion, that is what Patrick called the current situation in the Ukraine. Well said.

Salt Pile

3. The most valuable commodity before a big storm is? SALT! I went to no less than 8 places looking for it yesterday. I found none--they all were sold out! I need to start looking earlier for the next storm.

4. How do you know a big storm is coming to the Baltimore area? They preempt the news for the weather.

5. When I went to bed last night I was hoping that the forecast for ice and snow was a bad dream. It wasn't.

6. I watched two Orioles baseball games over the weekend. Awesome! It was sunny and warm in Florida--and I'm not there, why?

7. I watched a lot of the Oscars program last evening. There are a couple of movies that I need to watch. Overall, I was not surprised by the outcomes.

8. Springtime is coming--I am sure. I just can't see it yet.

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

Guarding the Wine

Riordin the Wine Guard

Sometimes the animals in the house do things that are just funny, but perfectly innocent. 

Such was the case yesterday as Riordin decided that a wine box was sitting on the table needed to be guarded to protect it from the dog and whomever else might be in the house. 

Riordin remained perched on the wine box for quite a while and had no issues as I documented his self-appointed role.

I'm just glad he just guards and doesn't drink the wine. That would surely be expensive!

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

People Watching in the Hospital

I spent yesterday in the waiting room of the outpatient surgery center of Johns Hopkins Hospital with Chris, who was having a minor procedure. Talk about confusion and bureaucratic inefficiency--that was the story of my day. 

The day was lost from the very beginning. Both the surgery center and the time of the surgery were change on the day before. The big problem was that they forgot to tell us that the surgery had been slipped from 1030 to 1230. No problem, I can handle that. But as the day wore on, the surgery slipped with each passing hour until finally occurring at 3 PM. Ugh! We did not finally depart until almost 6PM.

Fortunately, I had my trusty cell phone for company. Until the battery died. 

It was the realization that the cell phone would expire before the day ended that caused me to begin watching the people.

I remember an older couple waiting for the husband to have a procedure. I was amazed that when the man was called, the wife waved good-bye and didn't walk with him to go back for surgery. The wife then opened her purse and began to eat lunch right there in the waiting room. I only mention it because there were a lot of people waiting for procedures and they cannot eat--and so I am sure the food caused some angst among those who were hungry as lunchtime approached.

I was also fascinated by other people, some furiously conducting business on their cell phones while plugged into the wall trying not to think about their loved one in the surgery center. A needed distraction from a long day, I am sure.

And I overheard a sad story involving a man whose significant but unmarried other was having surgery, but he could not have access to help verify insurance information to get prescriptions. Somehow, the laws enacted to protect privacy have run amok by excluding people who are responsible for health care from access to the information they need, but, it seems the government can get any personal data that it wants.

There were so many people, coming and going during the day--until the end. We were almost the last people to leave. They were cleaning up the center around us as we left, more than eight hours after we had arrived. I was happy to pay the $12 parking fee and drive home after the successful surgery.

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD