Relationships

People are people after all.

We are a fickle as the light breeze during the dog days of summer.

It is often hard to understand why others cannot comprehend our true intentions when we are in the middle of a "situation."

I reflected on the relationships that I have the other day and realized that they are so numerous and varied that even I cannot fully characterize them all. They range from the most casual meeting in a store between customers in line to the deep intimate relationship that I have with my spouse. And all of the potential shades in between.

Consider the brief meeting between two drivers on the highway as one passes another and acknowledges their mutual presence on the highway. Brief, somewhat impersonal--but an important relationship since both are independently operating a motor vehicle which can cause, in mere moments. death and destruction when improperly handled.

Or the interchange between a father and a son. How this relationship changes as the years progress. Or how it should change. The way parents and children interact changes distinctly as years progress. It can be really hard for parents to move making every decision to a more hands-off approach as the children become adults.

Why do relationships go bad?

Relationships must grow to be vital--when they become static, dissatisfaction appears.


-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

What's for Dinner

Riordan deciding whether he is the main course or not.

Insanity in Afghanistan for the sake of Anarchy

This is going to be a bit controversial, but I don't understand the violence in Afghanistan over the alleged defiling of the printed Koran. People are dying for a lie.

That's right. A lie.

Although the US and NATO are accused of defiling the holy word of the Koran by burning, in truth the books had already been defiled by the muslim believers who had written in them forcing the US and NATO to find a way to dispose of the defiled documents. I also do not understand why this is not being more widely reported.

Why aren't those, alleged believers, who originally wrote in the books and defiled the holy koran being punished in the same manner that they are calling for the base commander to be punished?

The Financial Times reported:

The Nato-led force has said the destruction of the Korans was unintentional. Officials said the burned Korans were among a batch of Islamic books that were designated for disposal after being confiscated from detainees who had written messages in them, according to the Associated Press. Afghan officials said about four Korans were burned, the news agency reported.

Anyone who understands the muslim view of their holy Koran, knows that the books were already defiled. The US and NATO forces were set up, again.

But then, lying and being deceitful is authorized by the Koran.

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

Monday Musings - February 27, 2012

1. Believe it or not, there are only three days left in this month.

2. Sunny Sunday raking leaves. Yeah, it is February, but the leaves have to go!

3. So doesn't this seem funny? They delayed the Daytona 500 because of rain. I have to drive in the rain, why don't race car drivers have to race in the rain? They are driving cars, right?

4. We have a lot of channels on our TV--but we tend to watch only a few. Wouldn't it be nice to pay by the channel? And then maybe by the program for just those we want to see?

5. What do the Oscar's say about life? Do the movies being made and celebrated provide any insights into our society?

6. Baseball season is upon us. The first spring training games are next week.

7. Interestingly, Ronald Reagan was selected as the best of the Presidents since WWII. He was followed by Roosevelt then Kennedy. I think it was because they were the only presidents most of the people could remember.

8. Who knew NYC was so close? Easy by bus, frustrating by car.

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

When the Evening Begins

The day is over and Chris is on her way back from the bus station. The wine


is poured and we are ready to catch up after a weekend apart.

Let's rock.


-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

End of the Season--Start of the Season

Yesterday was the last of the eight game youth basketball season. Ethan's team showed incredible improvement during the season and it was fun to watch them learn the game and grow as players.

I admit, at times it was really humorous (or frustrating) to watch the kids learning the game and doing some really funny things--like guarding their man while the ball is rolling free behind them.

But that is how we learn, isn't it?

Sometimes I could hear the frustration in the parents voices as children failed to put together seemingly simple concepts of the game--but the difference in experience was decades versus weeks.

In a few years (all too short years) some of these kids will be stars on their high school basketball squads--after they have gained experience, grown, and learned skills.

We aren't born with all of the knowledge and skills we need to do everything in life. Living is a day-by-day process of learning and acquiring skills to be successful.

OK--so basketball is over, now on to another new sport, lacrosse. Somehow I feel like Ethan will look a bit like an armadillo in his gear as he learns a whole new set of skills. At least I can take Makayla with me to the games.

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

Traffic Gripes, Part 2

I received a couple of additions in a comment on my Traffic Gripes blog from the other day and wanted to share them:

People who speed up as you turn left in front of them or as you are passing them on the highway.

And then the combo, people you nicely allow onto the highway by moving into the left lane but then who speed up so you can't get back into the right lane.

I also want to add---

Road hogs. People who drive in the right lane of a local four lane road precluding people from entering the road from the intersecting side streets.

Toll booth crazies. If you live in an area where there are no toll booths, you won't see this, but I just fear for the undecided or impatient driver who changes toll booth lanes without looking.

Bumper rider. I know they are impatient, and I would get out of the lane if I could, but positioning their car like a NAASCAR driver drafting the leader doesn't help the situation.

Road rabbit. Speeding and lane changing at high rates of speed scaring everyone else on the road but somehow escaping unscathed.

I look forward any others that may be out there.

-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

Litter, garbage, and respect

The other day, I saw a person throw a cup out their car window into a parking lot. I really could not believe that they felt that the world was their waste basket. What kind of people have so little respect for the environment and other people that they throw their garbage out of the car window?

Was it an accident? Did the cup accidentally fall out of the car? I think not. As it was cold outside, they had to roll the window down before ejecting the offending cup from the car.

And since then, I've witnessed at least three cigarette butts being tossed out of vehicles. Except at night, I had never noticed that before. What is the mindset of people who toss garbage out of moving vehicles and into traffic?

Why do we as a society have so little respect for things and places that are not ours. For instance the movie theater--people leave their garbage at their seats. And I saw the local flea market lot on Saturday after the market closed--garbage strewn everywhere.

Have we become a society where we believe that we are the only ones who matter? Do we no longer respect ourselves or others?

If we do not care for the shared spaces, soon we will be sharing them with rats. Rats love garbage.


-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

Looking for Glory, Finding the Cross

I had some time last evening as I was driving home to hit the play button on my phone and listen to some music I hadn't listened to some of the music in a long time.

I guess it had been almost four years--right when the miracle baby Jackson came into the world to amaze me with God's grace and showed me that we needed to make changes in our lives and worship. And we did something incredibly hard by severing ties with our church and our friends in search of grace and truth.

And I started listening to the Rich Mullins song that started playing. It is off the 1998 The Jesus Record which was done after his untimely death. The song is All the Way to Kingdom Come

The chorus really hit me as I was driving. It was Ash Wednesday, after all.

We didn't know what love was 'til he came
And He gave love a face and He gave love a name
And He gave love away like the sky gives the rain and sun
We were looking for heroes, He came looking for the lost
We were searching for glory, and He showed us a cross
Now we know what love is 'cause He loves us
All the way to kingdom come

More lyrics: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/r/rich_mullins/#share

And I realized that sometimes I spend too much time looking for heroes (or trying to be a hero) and searching for glory when the only thing I need to be doing is searching for Jesus and getting closer to him.


-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD

Traffic Gripes

Turning wide--drivers who cannot make a simple right hand turn into the closest lane are either lazy or need to have their licenses revoked. There is no reason to wait at the end of a street until both lanes of traffic are clear before turning right into the clear outside lane.

Not signaling--still one of my pet peeves. I spend a lot of time when driving trying to discern whether a driver is intending to change lanes because the lack of turn signal etiquette is so rampant.

Not allowing the "on" ramp room to enter--I love being stuck on the on-ramp, running our of road real estate attempting to merge. Everyone else on the road had to merge at some point. Why can't they provide a window of access for others?

Talking on the phone--Head down, gabbing and not paying attention. Dangerous and scary a lot of the time.

Frosted windows--on those cold mornings, it is really scary to see the number of vehicles impaired by lack of vision. They have become an accident looking for a place to happen. Scrape the ice!

I wonder if we become too complacent the longer we drive and begin to forget the things that make us safe drivers?

Time to do a driving inventory.


-- Bob Doan, Elkridge, MD